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  I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast 
 There are multiple happenings, which is why I, a humble public servant, have
 categorized them for you.  
   
 **Local News**
     * Lego Company [sends an email](/threads/2019-08-29-the-lego-group-unauthorized-use-of-the-lego-group-intellectual-property-kiwifarms-net-case-652509.60303/).  
 (Update: They've officiated a [DMCA takedown notice](/threads/2019-08-29-the-
 lego-group-unauthorized-use-of-the-lego-group-intellectual-property-kiwifarms-
 net-case-652509.60303/post-5250463) to 1776hosting.)  
 (Update #2: They've sent me [another, identical complaint](/threads/2019-08-29
 -the-lego-group-unauthorized-use-of-the-lego-group-intellectual-property-
 kiwifarms-net-case-652509.60303/post-5276312).)
 
     * We're back on DDG, Bing, Yahoo, Qwant et al after they've [re-indexed Kiwi Farms](/threads/duckduckgo-has-blocked-kiwi-farms.60111/), recognizing our territorial soverignty and international charters.
     * Finally, a [good fuckin' mailbag](/threads/2019-09-02-jayden-desino-harassment-in-my-youtube-comments-and-thread-issue.60455/). (Update: They've sent me [their own IC3 report](/attachments/b7dafe47-fd44-482d-9c41-749bb079ff74-page-001-jpg.919920/) where they told the FBI I called them a retard.)
   
   
 **Internet Drama**
     * Alec Holowka [has killed himself](/threads/zoe-quinn-chelsea-van-valkenburg-locke-valentine-unburntwitch-primeape-crashoverride.14263/post-5257942) after being accused of sex abuse by Zoe Quinn.
     * Lowtax [gives a shoutout](/threads/richard-lowtax-kyanka.1222/post-5268022).
     * Local swamp monster [Brianna Wu was with Cenk "The Armenian Genocide Didn't Happen" Uygur on TYT](/threads/2019-aug-27-brianna-wus-appearance-on-the-young-turks.60490/).
   
   
 **Weeb Menace**
     * Uncovered sworn statements against Ron Toye indicate [he is a lifelong domestic abuser](/threads/monica-rial-monica-jean-rial-rialisms-ron-toye-ronald-toye-iii-rontoye3.55353/post-5236094).
     * Everyone working on DBZ just had [Funimation audio leaks](/threads/funimation-audio-leaks.60342/).
     * Vic's representation [has filed a 1,200 page counter](/threads/victor-mignogna-v-funimation-productions-llc-et-al.55556/post-5257111) to the TCPA.
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 ##  [Chat](/chat/general-chat.1/)
 
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 /locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 39 minutes ago
 
 Maybe it was like, 2017ish? I started drnking like every day that year.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 39 minutes ago
 
 [@Locomotive Derangement](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/37821/), get some help
 ![:\)](/styles/custom/emotes/svg/chris-smile.svg)
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 38 minutes ago
 
 [@Spl00gies](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/23299/) Update on that actually, I
 attempted to.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 38 minutes ago
 
 I was directed to a recovery program. No thanks, I already went to high school
 once.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 37 minutes ago
 
 I'd much rather end up freezing to death in a ditch than getting locked in a
 cage with a bunch of drug addicts again.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 37 minutes ago
 
 Good! Keep trying, don't give up. I'd like to read some of your writing if you
 get back into it
 
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 [totse](/members/totse.15562/)
 
 37 minutes ago
 
 I've kind of started drinking probably too often. Not that I'm trying to fall
 down a hole, it's just that I still like getting fucked up and playing vidya,
 and I don't want to be stoned all the time anymore, and it's been a few years
 since I was into the RC scene enough to know what to try and where to get it
 
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 [totse](/members/totse.15562/)
 
 37 minutes ago
 
 (RIP MXE)
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 37 minutes ago
 
 By the way, that freezing to death story is not an exaggeration, I knew a guy
 who worked at a brewery who actually died like that.
 
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 [totse](/members/totse.15562/)
 
 36 minutes ago
 
 I've heard that's not particularly uncommon
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 36 minutes ago
 
 He got a free 12-pack every week and probably spent the majority of his pay
 check on booze. After a cold snap the cops found him dead in his lean-to under
 a bridge somewhere.
 
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 [totse](/members/totse.15562/)
 
 36 minutes ago
 
 Oh, I was thinking more of people who freeze walking home
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 35 minutes ago
 
 [@Locomotive Derangement](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/37821/), different
 help, doesn't have to be a substance abuse thing, I don't think they're
 helpful unless you've multiple addictions with co-morbid complications. It's
 usually only helpful if it's court ordered and no voluntary. Too easy to
 network or mix with people who don't want to get better
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 35 minutes ago
 
 He apparently dressed and acted sane enough that nobody knew he was homeless
 until he turned up dead.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 34 minutes ago
 
 that's sad
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 34 minutes ago
 
 I think I've gone soft
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 33 minutes ago
 
 If you have seen the quality of mental health in this place, you'd be drinking
 under a bridge in the dead of winter too.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 33 minutes ago
 
 [@Locomotive Derangement](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/37821/), same here tbh
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 32 minutes ago
 
 Is eating cockles for breakfast a bad idea?
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 32 minutes ago
 
 Probably better than having beer for breakfast like I am.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 30 minutes ago
 
 I'd kill for some vodka and peach schnapps, ngl. Been making cocktails lately.
 Later, maybe...
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 30 minutes ago
 
 Oh yeah, also on the mental health front, a few people I know managed to go
 completely clean. No weed, few beers, no liquor, etc.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 29 minutes ago
 
 They have turned into complete emotional wrecks. Like, sobbing every day for
 no reason.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 29 minutes ago
 
 no weed? all my wat
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 28 minutes ago
 
 I had a relative over recently and a good two hours of it was just waiting
 around for them to stop crying after some kind of psychotic panic attack.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 28 minutes ago
 
 for no reason?
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 27 minutes ago
 
 My response to that stressful situation was to just buy another 12 pack.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 27 minutes ago
 
 There are "reasons" for the attacks such as stress and some horrible shit that
 happened in the past but there were no actual triggers.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 26 minutes ago
 
 you sure the addiction and all the hassle that comes with it isn't making them
 feel hopeless enough to cry?
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 26 minutes ago
 
 Mine is hidden quite well from them.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 26 minutes ago
 
 lol humble high functioning brag
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 26 minutes ago
 
 People generally fail to notice when I'm drunk in the daytime, they think i'm
 just awkward or uncomfortable.
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 25 minutes ago
 
 reliance on alcohol usually means someone isn't mentally well anyway. Alcohol
 is just a very shitty medication against it
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 25 minutes ago
 
 Bridge hobo hid it well too though lol
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 25 minutes ago
 
 I agree, but the alternatives seem quite disturbing to me.
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 25 minutes ago
 
 usually if someone drops it it's a good idea for them to use therapy or
 something to deal with whatever it was that led them into addiction and self-
 destructive behaviour
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 25 minutes ago
 
 [@Rio](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/17/), agree
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 24 minutes ago
 
 because just going clean usually only fixes half the problem
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 24 minutes ago
 
 it doesn't fix why someone became an alcoholic in the first place
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 24 minutes ago
 
 so it becomes too easy to relapse
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 24 minutes ago
 
 but that's just what I think
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 24 minutes ago
 
 Yeah bridge hobo should have a plaque or something to show people that our
 mental health system is so fucked he just quietly accepted his fate and let
 himself die.
 
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 [Hortator](/members/hortator.7331/)
 
 24 minutes ago
 
 Stress from work?
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 24 minutes ago
 
 deal with the feels, don't numb, you bum! Unless it's anal feels, then numb
 away
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 23 minutes ago
 
 He wasn't on drug or anything either that I know of, he just got wasted in his
 hovel every night.
 
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 [Hortator](/members/hortator.7331/)
 
 23 minutes ago
 
 [@Spl00gies](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/23299/), first time you ve left me
 speechless
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 23 minutes ago
 
 [@Hortator](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/7331/), sure it is
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 22 minutes ago
 
 My point is I'm not in a hurry to quit drinking myself to death if I'm gonna
 turn into a wreck that starts sobbing constantly.
 
 (edited)
 
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 [Hortator](/members/hortator.7331/)
 
 22 minutes ago
 
 [@Spl00gies](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/23299/), well, there was that time I
 saw your clavicle ![;\)](/styles/custom/emotes/svg/chris-wink.svg)
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 22 minutes ago
 
 People already think I'm enough of a tard as it is.
 
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 [Hortator](/members/hortator.7331/)
 
 21 minutes ago
 
 Very good skeleton, almost completely intact
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 21 minutes ago
 
 if you'd turn into a sobbing wreck without booze, you need to fix that without
 booze
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 20 minutes ago
 
 Local doctors here lean heavily on the "Suck it up" method of psychology due
 to our massive opiate epidemic. They don't want to prescribe anything.
 
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 20 minutes ago
 
 [@Hortator](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/7331/), mildly holey from my
 osteopenia but they catch the light better that way
 
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 20 minutes ago
 
 [@Locomotive Derangement](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/37821/), doctors here
 terrify people away from going cold turkey
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 18 minutes ago
 
 Here is basically recovery program or suck it up.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 18 minutes ago
 
 Or become bridge hobo.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 18 minutes ago
 
 DIY it. Write about how detox feels, if you can't hold a cup or a pen through
 any shakes, have some first aid (small drink, only one) until you aren't
 shaking. Keep at it, lower amounts and extend days between drinking. You can
 do it. You're obviously masking and numbing something with it
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 17 minutes ago
 
 if you think not drinking will turn you into a crying wreck, there's some
 underlying issue that you need to fix
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 17 minutes ago
 
 ^ this
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 17 minutes ago
 
 I have managed to stop drinking for brief spells. I have episodes where I just
 stare at things and feel the onset of sobbing attacks, so whatever my
 relatives have is definitely in my blood too.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 16 minutes ago
 
 Yeah, alcoholism. Most will sob and have emotional/mood issues when sobering
 up
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 15 minutes ago
 
 Back before I drank I used to deal with it by getting monumentally pissed off
 and abusive. For whatever reason that simply won't return when I'm sober, so I
 feel really disarmed.
 
 (edited)
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 14 minutes ago
 
 and you want that back? you obviously have issues with emotional regulation.
 Work on those and it will get easier. Drink/drugs won't help though
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 14 minutes ago
 
 I suspect if I was more physically fit I'd be one of those kinds of people
 that goes out and gets into fights for no reason.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 13 minutes ago
 
 Yes I want that anger and controlling behavior back, it gave me a sense of
 agency and made people stay the fuck out of my way. Now I'm like, helpless. It
 sucks, I barely have the will to get out of bed half the time.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 12 minutes ago
 
 why can't you connect with people?
 
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 11 minutes ago
 
 you do fine in chat
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 11 minutes ago
 
 I find them horrendously simple-minded.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 11 minutes ago
 
 I'm not even what I would consider a smart person.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 11 minutes ago
 
 what makes people as a whole simple minded?
 
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 [Melchett](/members/melchett.61/)
 
 10 minutes ago
 
 isnt therapy super easy to get in murica
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 10 minutes ago
 
 Like, smart people are nuclear physicists or chemists and shit. But most
 conversations I have with anyone else are like, so fucking banal and
 pointless.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 9 minutes ago
 
 [@Melchett](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/61/), I always thought it'd be easier
 than accessing therapy in the UK
 
 (edited)
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 9 minutes ago
 
 You can get therapy over here it just hasn't evolved since the 1960s.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 9 minutes ago
 
 [@Locomotive Derangement](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/37821/), do you think
 in black and white often?
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 8 minutes ago
 
 [@Spl00gies](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/23299/) No, I actually think in kind
 of a gradient. It really confuses people.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 8 minutes ago
 
 I mean you spoke pretty highly of bridge hobo
 
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 [totse](/members/totse.15562/)
 
 8 minutes ago
 
 gradients are so 2000s
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 8 minutes ago
 
 SPECTRUM is where it's at
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 8 minutes ago
 
 I never knew bridge hobo personally, I just know he represents a problem I'm
 currently now facing.
 
 (edited)
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 7 minutes ago
 
 Or rather, he was the victim of a larger menace I'm now dealing with.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 6 minutes ago
 
 Therapy is so clumsy though. I can't just tell myself something to change my
 mood or opinion on it.
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 5 minutes ago
 
 Like, can people really do that? Just have a thought and have it change their
 perspective? Does that work for anyone?
 
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 [maaliktheprisonguard](/members/maaliktheprisonguard.36417/)
 
 4 minutes ago
 
 ww2 media is boring
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 4 minutes ago
 
 I've tried lying to therapists, not lying to therapists, the results are
 generally the same.
 
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 [maaliktheprisonguard](/members/maaliktheprisonguard.36417/)
 
 4 minutes ago
 
 yes i would love to see 5 hitler documentaries in a row
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 3 minutes ago
 
 so you sympathise/empathise with him since you're having similar struggles.
 But he wasn't an intellectual genius of reknown, y'know. Therapy can be hit an
 miss but it's usually hard work. Like you say, changing a thought process or a
 core belief can seem impossible. It isn't -our brains are incredibly malleable
 and pathways change all the time
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 3 minutes ago
 
 They have a checklist of treatments they are compelled to go through to
 protect themselves from legal action. So the process is slow, excrutiating and
 ultimately pointless.
 
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 [Orth](/members/orth.13596/)
 
 3 minutes ago
 
 [@maaliktheprisonguard](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/36417/), only when there
 are aliens
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 2 minutes ago
 
 The trouble with changing any of my ways of thinking is that you must actually
 convince me to change my mind. I need evidence and often further information,
 I can't just read some poems and talk positively, nothing happens. Actually in
 those cases I feel even worse afterwards.
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 1 minute ago
 
 [@Locomotive Derangement](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/37821/), lying to
 therapists after struggling to get a therapist suggests you're far more
 comfortable being unwell than you would be to solve your problem
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 A moment ago
 
 [@Spl00gies](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/23299/) It was more a period of
 experimentation to see if I could manipulate them to get better results. They
 acted precisely the same as when I'd been perfectly honest to them.
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 A moment ago
 
 if you think everyone you talk to is simple minded and banal, maybe the
 problem is your personality
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 A moment ago
 
 The system is very bureaucratic, they have a checklist.
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 A moment ago
 
 just throwing that out there
 
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 [Orth](/members/orth.13596/)
 
 A moment ago
 
 a frontal lobe lobatomy would prob be good
 
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 [Rio](/members/rio.17/)
 
 A moment ago
 
 usually when someone thinks something is everyone else's problem, it's just
 theirs
 
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 [Spl00gies](/members/spl00gies.23299/)
 
 A moment ago
 
 Are you afraid of getting well, re-engaging with your passion only to find
 that you're nothing special or even -gasp- mediocre at it? You don't have to
 be the best, or a genius to find meaning and happiness in your life
 
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 [Locomotive Derangement](/members/locomotive-derangement.37821/)
 
 A moment ago
 
 [@Orth](https://kiwifarms.pl/members/13596/) Maybe a cranial lead injection
 one of these days.
 
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  GG forums were created on KiwiFarms and 8chan as a result. This was the best
 and worst thing. The monster was now a virus. We banned links to, and then
 mention of certain links and topics. Now we became the enemy. 
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